Saturday, November 3, 2012

The Scientist


If I was feeling anger, I could have meant saying “He really ruined my life”.
Going back…
If I had not pushed on such a childish relationship just because I thought my friend would be so hurt if she still continues on with her relationship with him, and because I wanted to prove Leophold that I’m mature enough to move on without him, I could have just lived my entire college life as I planned it to be. But LOve really moved things way too much.
But I don’t feel anger, to the point that I wanted to blame people for what’s really happening.
It is of course entirely my fault.
I live in the past and get even more affected by the present.
Things like: I wish I just let my friend handle this guy with their hopeless LDR or…
                                I wish I just broke up with him when I felt like we’re getting serious and Leaphold was really turning his way or…
                                                I wish I just really moved on and try not to deny that I’m still hoping…

Truth is, there’s only one conclusion to all these…
My life’s messed up right now because I really have a very weak FAITH
In the end, I’d still call myself IMMATURE.

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