The Bar

I had this gathering with my high school friends today which caused me to miss the Christmas party at my church. Ugh. Well all’s fine because I enjoyed it.

And it’s like my first time also to drink, well not like shots and stuffs. We did “Lasing Bobo” and I participated well because I lost like 4 times so I had the Bar 4 times as well :)). Yeah that was my first time. The thing is, am I getting prettier or guys just make me feel like it? I had this high school love affair. Well we’ve never been a real couple but there was something. He was quite surprised and concerned about me drinking because he knows I don’t, I never did. That gave me a bit of the red cheek. I felt like I like him again or something.

When we left, I was separated with the girls because they weren’t that conscious with the time so I had the guys with me and I tell you, it is that faaaaaaaar. I mean, like walking from bakakeng to main campus and no exaggeration! So I was with them and we hitched except that I was in a fancier car. I was with him and the guys and he intentionally helped me out with the gifts and sat beside me on our way to town. (yes, the hitching didn’t reach the town so it’s that far). We were having a good time. They, him in particular, asked me a couple of questions, including me and my Jake. I didn’t like the fact that because I was with Mel and I’m letting him show off something familiar from the past, that I was cheating over my Jake. No. that’ll be bad and I don’t lke it either. I stayed silent and smiled like we were fine. I saw the look in his eyes and I saw a little hope and he then asked me “Maguunli ka ba mamaya?”. I ignored that though. They asked me about debut, I know he was expecting me to make him a part of my 18 dances but they laughed when I told them I wanted a Mcdo Debut.

I changed the topic and asked him about his church life, he said it’s not like it was before. And then he went back to the Jake question. I told him, “Ewan ko, ok ata kami except that lilipat na siya ng school sa Pampanga”. Cam in joshua with “Panu ba yan, iiwan ka na niya”. That stopped me and they then started teasing me with “Uyyyy bitter! Masisingle-an na naman si Jully”. That’s when I stopped talking.

By this time, he’s texting me and I’m ignoring him. I don’t want Mel to expect that because my boyfriend’s leaving me, doesn’t mean there’s gonna be us.

That bothers me though. I can’t stop God’s will. Jake will indeed leave me hanging here alone. Traum…